Dead Hot: Season of the Witch (2023) Review - Nauseating Vanessa Hudgens Dreck
Welcome to Knockout Horror. It’s the final day of our Low Budget Horror on Tubi feature. What better way to wrap things up than with something that isn’t actually a horror and, actually, is barely a movie at all? Today we are reviewing Dead Hot: Season of the Witch from 2023.
We wanted to wrap this feature up with a Tubi Original. It seems only right considering the feature was based around low budget Tubi horror. We checked the watch list and two things came up. A movie about people being attacked by sharks and this. Now I was all ready to watch some people having their limbs removed by the lions of the sea but my fiancee suggested we check this one out instead. I mean, we love witches and the Salem witch trials are fascinating. What a big mistake!
Dammit!!
Dead Hot: Season of the Witch is not horror, not in the slightest. I have to make that clear because Tubi sure as hell didn’t. Slapping this in the horror section is akin to calling Grave Encounters a factual documentary. Dead Hot is about as far away from horror as you can possibly get. As the movie goes on, it seems to get further and further away.
This movie can best be described as a Vanessa Hudgens vanity project and I say this as someone who thinks Hudgens is insanely talented. Dead Hot is advertised as an exploration into witchcraft, the paranormal and all things supernatural. Dead Hot is actually a trip into the minds of two people that seem a little lost and could probably use some counseling. Searching for answers to life’s questions in hokey witchcraft rituals, paranormal con artists and spell books.
Much of what happens here is presented as fact. Despite, clearly, being the work of manipulating third parties and an over enthusiastic pair of mates looking for answers. Hudgens, and her friend, GG Magree, spend nearly two hours overreacting to non-events and finding meaning in the meaningless. This entire movie is like a drunken conversation that you think is really insightful. Only to wake up the next day realising how much of a twat you made of yourself.
A Little Backstory
This movie comes about, strangely, as a result of the 2020 worldwide crisis. When most celebrities were singing Imagine on Zoom and telling us to stay indoors while chilling in their cavernous mansions. Vanessa Hudgens was hitting up Google and searching the terms “I am a Witch!!1!”, “Am I Witch?” and “Is Witches real?”. Apparently fostering a new found interest in everything supernatural.
She hosted Witchy zoom calls (because even the supernatural has to get with the times), she learned spells and she began conceiving one of the worst pieces of media I have ever watched. Describing herself as a self taught student of witchcraft. Hudgens teams up with her bestie, musician GG Magree. And heads over to Salem to see whether she can make the tragic and horrific witch trials into something about herself. Sounds harsh but that is really what this movie is about.
Brushing off the hokey nature of typical paranormal investigations and aiming for something altogether more mature and considered. What starts as a somewhat interesting look into the atrocities faced by women during the trials. Quickly devolves into hokey paranormal investigations centered around two people who both eagerly want the spotlight. Once again, this is not horror. This is reality TV disguised as an investigation into the supernatural.
It’s Probably Gonna Piss Some People Off
The majority of Dead Hot features Hudgens and Magree conducting paranormal investigations in, supposedly, haunted locations in Salem. These segments are then woven together with scenes of the ladies discussing the events. As well as scenes where the pair meet up with incredibly cooky paranormal “experts” who cold read the pair and, essentially, promote their pseudo skills as fact while conducting strange ceremonies. There’s a very dismissive attitude to the paranormal here which may upset some of the people who take this subject extremely seriously.
The investigations are no less hokey than any other paranormal investigations you have ever seen. The only real difference is the incredibly histrionic reactions of the two women. Particularly Magree who seems a little wired. I’m not sure how many drugs were involved in the production of this documentary but I am gonna guess the answer is somewhere between “many” and “a lot”. B-Roll of the women wandering from location to location plays against a soundtrack of awful electronic pop music. All while Hudgens seems to grow less and less interested in what is going on.
The truth of the matter is that Dead Hot is not really about the paranormal or witches. Dead Hot is about Vanessa Hudgens and GG Magree finding themselves. Dead Hot: Season of the Witch is described as: “an intimate journey into the supernatural realm that serves as a coming-of-age story that explores identity”. I am really confused. Do they mean a “coming of middle age” story? This is two women who are approaching 35. Ladies, you have already come of age, it’s done, your body is already dying. I’m there too, it sucks but youth is tremendously fleeting.
And Sooo Childlike
The coming of age thing sort of makes me laugh because these two act like they are 17. Hudgens and Magree come across incredibly immature for the majority of this documentary.. My fiancee kept remarking on why they repeatedly talk in a child like manner. I really couldn’t give her a solid answer. I just don’t think these two people have moved past their teens. It makes for awkward and frustrating viewing. A desire to know more about the locations they visit or even to learn a bit more about the witch trials is quickly squashed under a barrage of infantile behaviour and fake laughter.
Now let’s be real for a minute. Whether you like her or not, Vanessa Hudgens is a versatile and talented performer who, probably, hasn’t been afforded the opportunities she deserves. Be it because of the nefarious hacking incident over a decade ago or due to her position as a child actor. The majority of people who tune into this movie will, likely, be doing it because they are a fan of hers.
If you fall into that category, you may be disappointed. You are going to have to put up with Magree’s constant hogging of the limelight. Magree, unfortunately, does not play sidekick well; she has a tendency to draw attention to herself. Whether by being obnoxiously loud, forcing emotional reactions to the events, or simply pushing her way into focus. This, inadvertently, pushes Hudgens into the background, something that is somewhat frustrating as Hudgens can be rather thoughtful and plays events off with more skepticism. If this movie focused purely on Hudgens, I think we might have been onto something. The two of them together, however, bring out the worst in each other.
Any Positive Points?
I suppose some people might find Dead Hot funny in parts. The humour is very much that of two women acting like they are teenagers and having a laugh. But if that is your trip then you will enjoy some of the pair’s interactions. If you are a fan of Magree’s music then good for you, the movie is littered with it. Hudgens fans may enjoy seeing a more intimate side of her character as well as hearing some of her insight into things. Even if it does fall very much into the “Woe is me”, self pitying celebrity category that we are all so familiar with.
The themes of sisterhood and female togetherness are a definite positive. Don’t get me wrong, I think the whole witchcraft thing is used to gloss over some issues that the ladies probably need counselling for. Especially Magree when it comes to her need to be loved, something which hints at potential personality disorder traits. As well as her prevailing feelings regarding her Grandmother’s death.
But it is good to see women promoting togetherness. Female specific issues are being increasingly ignored. Pushed aside to wave a flag that is far more trendy at the moment. Women and girls absolutely need to see positive representations of female togetherness and these two women seem to be a good example of that. It’s really nice to see.
Should You Watch Dead Hot?
If you are looking at this movie as a potential option for a night of paranormal investigation fun, you will be disappointed. Whereas Vanessa Hudgens and GG Magree bring along all the fancy equipment and ghost hunting tools. They also bring along limited knowledge of the subject and histrionic overreactions. This is not a movie for paranormal fans and, most definitely, not a movie for fans of horror. This is a Vanessa Hudgens vanity project that might not appeal to even fans of hers. There are positives but fans of horror should definitely give this one a miss.
