Cellar Door (2024) review – Laurence Fishburne Can’t Save This Predictable Metaphor
Cellar Door: Quick Verdict
The Verdict: A massive wasted opportunity that squanders a genuinely intriguing premise on a bland, “Lifetime movie” style domestic thriller. While the hook of a free house with one forbidden room is compelling, Cellar Door fails to provide any meaningful follow-through, eventually devolving into a predictable crime mystery and a tedious love triangle. Despite a fleetingly excellent performance from Laurence Fishburne, the lead actors feel miscast in a story that prioritises heavy-handed metaphors over actual thrills or suspense. It’s a vanilla, middle-of-the-road trudge that feels like a bait-and-switch for anyone expecting a satisfying payoff. Not inherently terrible, but utterly forgettable.
Details: Director: Vaughn Stein | Cast: Jordana Brewster, Scott Speedman, Laurence Fishburne | Runtime: 1h 37m | Release Date: 2024
Best for: People looking for a low-stakes afternoon thriller who don’t mind a story that leans heavily on metaphor rather than mystery.
Worth noting: Despite the plot revolving around a “young couple” struggling with fertility, both lead actors are in their late 40s/early 50s, leading to some very jarring dialogue.
Where to Watch: Amazon Prime Video (Rent/Buy)🛒, Apple TV, Sky Store
Rating: 2.0/5 Stars
(Intriguing hook, poor follow-through, predictable ending)
Welcome to Knockout Horror. Today we are going to be checking out a thriller movie with a very compelling premise — Cellar Door. Yes, I know, it’s a thriller, not a horror, but I have pretty much settled into the acceptance that we cover both on this site. It just depends on whether the subject sounds interesting.
I’ve just put together a Cellar Door Ending Explained article, so if you need answers to this rather silly movie, click the link but be warned of spoilers.
Highlights
This one sounded interesting
Cellar Door has a super-interesting premise. A couple, Sera (Jordana Brewster) and John (Scott Speedman), have recently suffered a tragedy. After exhausting their savings paying for fertility treatment, Sera suffers a miscarriage. Wanting a completely fresh start, the pair begin looking for a new house. After a meeting is arranged between them and a well-connected man called Emmett (Laurence Fishburne), the pair are gifted the home of their dreams. There is only one catch: they must never unlock the cellar door.
Pretty intriguing, right? The couple are given a kick-ass home in the middle of an affluent neighbourhood completely free. All they have to do is stay the hell out of the cellar. Now, naturally, this is going to raise a few questions.
“The couple are given a kick-ass home completely free. All they have to do is stay the hell out of the cellar. It’s a simple rule, but the more simple the rule, the more likely it will be broken.”
What the hell is down there? Is the original owner still chilling out in the cellar and doesn’t want them to know? Do they have a massive Japanese knotweed problem, or is the place just horribly damp? Who knows? The fact of the matter is, it’s a simple rule, but you know how it goes with horror movies and thrillers. The more simple the rule, the more likely it will be broken.
An unfortunately wasted interesting concept
The problem with good ideas is that they need follow-through. They need a story building around them, a reason to care, and something to invest in. The problem with Cellar Door is that it has none of these things. Cellar Door acts as much more of an allegory for the human condition than an actual interesting plot device with a satisfying payoff and a big reveal. This is one of those films with a metaphorical meaning rather than a physical one.
At its heart, Cellar Door is a fairly simple crime mystery movie that focuses on a boring love triangle and little else. It might as well be called “The Electricity Bill” or “The Food Shopping List” for how little the cellar door concept factors into anything.
“Cellar Door is a weak hook to drag people in before giving them the ol’ bait and switch and hitting them with a very formulaic thriller. Nothing new and very little to recommend.”
It’s a weak hook to drag people in before giving them the ol’ bait and switch and hitting them with a very formulaic thriller. Nothing new, nothing surprising, and very little to recommend.
Bland and very boring
Sure, there is a slightly interesting mystery at the heart of the movie. Fans of thrillers with a very high tolerance for blandness may find something to enjoy, but I find it hard to believe that most viewers won’t be left wanting. Characters aren’t all that interesting, there is very little in the way of action or excitement, the majority of the movie plays out like a domestic drama, and the ending is incredibly predictable and unsatisfying.
It is worth noting how cheesy it feels when said ending starts to come together and characters announce big revelations, complete with flashbacks, as if the viewer didn’t get it already. Cellar Door really goes out of its way to subvert viewer expectations, but it is hideously obvious throughout. It plays out with a Hitchcock-esque panning shot and musical piece that screams “We got you, didn’t we?”, too, which really made me chuckle.
It’s just plain, milquetoast, “Lifetime television movie” style stuff. Fine for a Wednesday afternoon, but not exactly a decent option for a night of thrills, spills, and action. It doesn’t help that the whole affair feels a bit cheap. There’s a distinct sense of having to root through the bargain bin for both the cast and the general camerawork and set design. The script isn’t great, the direction is fairly average, and even the makeup work is pretty shoddy.
Weird casting choices
What makes this movie worse is some of the strange casting and scripting decisions. Our couple wave goodbye to their thirties a good few years ago. It makes sense why they would be struggling with fertility, because that type of thing doesn’t wait around forever, but they are presented here as if they are a pair of 20-somethings who just happened to get unlucky.
Everyone keeps referring to them as a “young couple” and remarking on how they have “their whole long lives ahead.” It’s pretty strange. I have been on the other side of 30 for a while, and the only time I can imagine myself being referred to as “young” is if I happened to die suddenly. Sure, I am not as old as these two, but it’s a point that bears mention.
“If you are going into this because of the intriguing premise, back away while you still can. Cellar Door is a metaphor and little else. It is as bland as they come.”
Scott Speedman was in his thirties when he starred in The Strangers. That was 16 years ago. It feels ridiculous. Neither actors stand out, either; they both put on rather cheesy performances worthy of a middle-of-the-afternoon thriller. Could they not have hired a couple of younger actors for this particular role? Laurence Fishburne has a fleeting appearance but is an absolute treat, as always. What a fantastic actor.
The Good, The Bad & The Ugly
The Good
- Laurence Fishburne: Although he only has a small amount of screen time, Fishburne is a delight. He brings a gravitas and charisma that the rest of the film sorely lacks.
- The Initial Concept: The central mystery – what is behind the door? – is a fantastic starting point that hooks the audience effectively for the first twenty minutes.
The Bad
- No Payoff: The film chooses metaphor over mystery. If you are expecting a shocking reveal or a terrifying secret in that cellar, you will be sorely disappointed.
- Bland Pacing: Most of the runtime plays out like a domestic drama, lacking the tension or urgency required for a successful thriller.
- Predictable Ending: The “big twists” are glaringly obvious from the start, and the film’s attempts to subvert expectations feel unearned and cheesy.
The Ugly: The Casting Logic. Being told that 50-year-old Scott Speedman and 44-year-old Jordana Brewster are a “young couple” with their “whole lives ahead” is truly bizarre and distracting.
Should You Watch Cellar Door?
Probably not. It’s a 2-star trudge that fails to deliver on its promise. It’s milquetoast, forgettable, and wastes a great hook on a very basic crime story. Unless you’re a massive Fishburne fan, give it a miss.
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